You think you made one decision this morning. You actually made two. The decision to do one thing is also the decision not to do something else, and what you don't do says as much about your character as what you do. Joshua once stood before the people he had led for decades and made his own choice plain, no debate, no hedging. Every father does the same thing, whether he says it out loud or not, through what he does and does not do. Values are seen in the yes, and in the no.

My grown children have no memory of 9/11. My two-week-old granddaughter never will either, though she will grow up shaped by the world it left behind. Pew research says that 10% of adults today were born after 2001. Twenty-five years after the event, telling this story is our responsibility and privilege (Psalm 78:4). It is a story of courage and sacrifice in the face of evil, and three truths about God that outlast tragedy...truths that we should never forget.

Courage isn't just what you do. It's how you live. And it's reflected in what you say. The root word for courage is the Latin word cor — strength of heart. Courageous people live from the inside out. And the way we teach our kids to interact with others is training their heart. There are four phrases courageous people say: "thank you," "You're welcome," "I'm sorry, " and "I forgive you." Dads have the opportunity to model every one of them and the responsibility to train his

Discipline has two sides to the coin: confront and compliment. What you correct and what you affirm should both be driven by the same thing — your values. That's what separates reactive parenting from intentional training. When my wife and I were raising our kids, we chose to confront three things: disobedience, deceitfulness, and disrespect. And we chose to compliment three things: thoughtfulness, thankfulness, and truthfulness. Both lists. Intentional. Values-driven.

"Wait until your father gets home" defined what dad's discipline meant. He was the enforcer. The closer. But if discipline is training, then a father's role isn't just to confront bad behavior. Discipline is one way a father shapes a child's heart. And the heart is where character is formed. A father has to choose between between performance-driven discipline and values-based training. The goal of a father's discipline isn't a compliant child. It's a courageous one.

It's said "more is caught than taught." That's especially true in parenting. Kids learn what matters by what gets repeated. Not just what gets said. What gets rewarded. What gets ignored. What gets corrected. What gets celebrated. These are the things that really teach and train your child. In Dad Academy, we talk about discipline differently. Discipline isn't punishment — it's training. And training is discipleship.

Dad, can I trust you? That's the question your child is already asking — at the pool, in adolescence, in every hard moment. Research from the Institute for Family Studies confirms: a father's trustworthiness isn't a bonus feature of good fathering — it's the foundation. Reliable. Loyal. Honest. Consistent. Build trust, build courage.